its so weird that one of the few things that completely and entirely unites an entire generation of jaded adults is an encyclopedic knowledge of spongebob quotes
*doesn’t check bank account*
*pretends everything is fine*
First comment is in response to a Facebook status I wrote saying “Once a guy ate a fistful amount of wasabi to try to impress me into giving him a bj… Which brings me to my point that boys are like cockroaches that you try to make go away 50 times but keep coming back from all the hits.”
I wasn’t trying to offend all boys, just the specific breed of horny boys who will do anything to get a sexual act out of women. I specified this in the comments also.
The next three photos are a Facebook status he wrote after I deleted him for writing “he didn’t rape you” because I have been a victim of sexual assault in my past.
misandry-mermaid I would appreciate if you could signal boost this if you see it because I could not find your submit button. Thank you so much.
Keep spreading because he’s said more shitty things to my friend after this
"Stop generalizing! If anything, women are the worse gender!" oh my god
There is too much awfulness to even address.
This is the greatest tweet in the history of tweets
The cutiest little Salem playing with some ribbon.
(Excuse the terrible quality of my camera.)
I’ve never met cr1tikal but I trust him.
I feel if I was in any horror situation I would be so safe and calm because with any other person they would be screaming and crying but if he and I were trapped in a building surrounded by ravenous mutants he would just be deadpan like “they are so rude I can’t believe this. Let’s blow this Popsicle stand.”
"You’ve gotta be stirring my pasta"
Mayonnaise is oil, egg yolk, and vinegar. Mayonnaise scares the crap out of me.
With Kenyatta on this. Deeply afraid of mayonnaise. (Also aioli, which is just mayonnaise with no consonants in it.)